Claire can’t seem to find the right time to fire one of her employees, while, back at home, Phil thinks he caught Luke with a girl in his bed, and no one seems to notice that Alex has moved back home for the summer. Jay refuses to accept that it might be harder to reenter the workforce than he thought, and Cameron and Mitch butt heads on how to share time with Lily now that Cameron took a summer job in Kansas City.
Dede is getting remarried, and Manny convinces the family to take the train up to the wedding. Jay could not be more ecstatic that Dede has moved on for good but his overenthusiasm might come back and bite him later. Claire and Mitchell work on their toast while Phil and Cam geek out over their favorite author, who is also on the train. Luke and Manny go a little girl crazy; Gloria gets stuck in coach; and Alex gets caught up in the romance of the train herself.
With Closet-Con right around the corner, Claire is on high alert and convinced there is a mole in the company. Meanwhile, Phil goes vigilante when he and Gloria confront Auntie Alice for stealing her hot sauce recipe. Jay tries to teach Joe how to do some manly handy work, and with prom coming up, Mitch helps Luke with his "promposal" while Cam helps with Manny's, but Cam goes a little overboard, revealing that there maybe something deeper going on.
Claire brings home a stray dog and gets the kids to help her hide it from Phil while she tries to find its owner. Unfortunately, her evasive behavior only makes Phil try even harder to shower her with more attention. Elsewhere, Gloria invites a new couple over even after Jay has made it clear he doesn’t want to make any new friends, but when the husband turns out to be a real guy’s guy, Jay might be eating crow. And Cameron rents out their upstairs apartment to a Christian rock band.
Manny and Luke babysit Lily so the adults in the family can have some fun, which includes Phil and Mitchell seeing a movie, Claire and Gloria going to a spa, and Jay and Cameron hitting a sports bar to watch a big fight, but Claire suspects the boys are going to throw a party.
Phil has the crazy idea of going on a spontaneous trip to Paris with Claire, the only problem is that they are both so ridiculously tired but try to push through it. Jay has taken over their bathroom remodel, which proves to be pretty hazardous for Gloria, Manny and Joe. Cameron's sister Pam is staying at the house after her husband has left her, but her emotional outbursts are driving Mitchell crazy. And Haley and Andy go on a wild night bender.
Phil has a new client whom he tries to hide from his wife because she's attractive, while Claire would rather keep her hot yoga instructor a secret. Jay becomes preoccupied making a Web show, but is tormented by an Internet troll. Lily is nervous about learning to ride a bicycle, and her parents aren't exactly the best teachers.
Jay and Gloria are suffering with a lack of sleep after Joe goes through a fussy phase. Claire's balance of life and work is so flawless and easy that her family is getting suspicious. Mitchell and Cameron are poorly treated at their friends' wedding and wonder what they did to deserve it.
A powerful storm hits Los Angeles and causes widespread power outages, so the entire Pritchett clan hunkers down at Jay and Gloria's house to use their generator. Meanwhile, Phil tries to make amends for an embarrassing moment, Mitchell and Cameron desperately try to save Lily's birthday party, and Haley turns on her charm for Andy.
Phil feels unappreciated as Claire is busy running the closet business. A life-size standee of Gloria for her hot sauce display receives some unsavory attention. Cam and Mitch feel suspicious of their new renters.
Claire decides to get rid of all of the clutter out of the house before taking over Jay's business. Jay's new hobby causes concern for Cameron.
Claire and the kids seize an opportunity to help expedite the ducks leaving the nest while Phil is off visiting Alex at college. Jay helps Mitch with Lily’s sleepover with her friends from her Vietnamese dance troupe. Gloria and Cam are off on a hot pepper heist carefully orchestrated by Manny in order to meet a big hot sauce delivery deadline.
Haley, Alex and Luke scramble to fulfill their promise of a special day for Cameron; Gloria arranges a playdate with a couple at Joe's school.
Gloria's plans for a White Christmas don't go as planned.
Gloria wins a silent auction to have a therapist come for an afternoon with the adults; Haley and Alex consider dumping their boyfriends.
Phil is selling an upscale home where various members of the family sneak off for alone time.
Phil is surprised by Claire's reaction to Luke's arrest; Mitchell helps Gloria figure out the secret to her family sauce recipe.
Gloria is excited at the possibility for being selected for jury duty; Claire brings Alex and Haley to work and hopes to impress them; Phil takes Manny and Luke's class to community service day.
Phil convinces Lily to help with hatch the ducks he made a habitat for; Claire wants to impress her father with some ideas she has for the business; Cam spends time bonding with the frat guys.
Mitchell takes a job with a rival of Jay's; Luke and Manny visit Alex but use the opportunity to meet girls; Gloria is upset when a cheerleader doesn't decorate Manny's locker; Phil and Claire try to play chicken when Dylan moves in.
Phil and Claire are hurt when Alex lies about her college move-in date and Luke doesn't want to spend the day at Phil's open house; being landlords stresses out Mitch and Cam.
Haley gets back together with Dylan. Alex and Sanjay plan their breakup since they are both going off to college. Mitchell avoids finding a new job and takes up art. Jay and Gloria try to find a good preschool for Joe.
