The guys regale each other with stories of youthful athletic accomplishments. Cleveland was a teenage baseball player from Cuba, Quagmire was a bad boy tennis superstar from New York and Peter was an underdog boxer from Philadelphia.
Brian tries to convince The Griffins that their new adopted cat, Pouncy, is evil.
Meg deals with a college admissions scandal, while Brian embarks on a fitness journey.
Lois and Peter are mistaken for "young parents" by another couple at Stewie's school and invited to live in a millennial apartment complex, leaving Meg and Chris home alone.
Brian has a microchip that reveals he had a family before the Griffins, when he then seeks out. After meeting the richer, smarter Hendersons, Brian struggles to enjoy his life with the Griffins as much as he once did.
After feeling unappreciated by her family, Lois taps into her villainous side and attempts to win "Best Customer" at her favorite coffee shop.
Stewie gets a mail order bride from Ukraine and experiences domestic life. Meanwhile, Peter and Chris become addicted to free hotel breakfast buffets.
Stewie designs a "Terminator" Peter robot to destroy Lois for trying to feed him broccoli, but when things don't go according to plan, Stewie and Brian must go on a Terminator-esque mission to save Stewie's life.
After attending a baseball game, Peter and Chris are inspired to start a memorabilia business. Meanwhile, Stewie tries to combat aging by getting plastic surgery, but ends up taking it too far.
Brian bonds with the son of his new girlfriend. Meanwhile, Peter, Quagmire and Cleveland take a joy ride in Joe's new classic corvette.
When Peter makes it through a bad flu season without getting sick, the hospital asks him to volunteer as a nurse, but he finds himself at a crossroads when his mortal enemy, The Giant Chicken, is admitted to the ER. Meanwhile, Brian receives his genetic test results and learns he is part cat, causing him to have an identity crisis.
When the family fails to help Lois with the Christmas shopping, she walks out on the family and the Griffins must try to save Christmas on their own.
Brian's new job as a journalist leads him to uncover that Pawtucket Pat, Quahog's hero and brewery founder, took part in racist actions against Native Americans. The town becomes divided on whether or not to remove the statue that commemorates him.
Lois and Peter are divided by differing views on who the next Mayor of Quahog should be. Upset at Lois' first choice, Peter seeks out the late Mayor Adam West's cousin, Wild Wild West.
Meg plans her wedding to an unexpected Quahog resident. Meanwhile, Peter finds a new vest and on one of many adventures fitting for his new attire, his arms are torn off and he is left with tiny hands that have yet to grow back.
When Joe asks Peter to be the godfather to his daughter, Peter commits to his mistaken interpretation of the role so much that he becomes a real gangster.
Peter and Lois accidentally set up a cutaway gag together, which somehow transports them into the cutaway itself.
When Peter injures himself and a family of squirrels in a chainsaw accident, Chris and Stewie take in one of the injured rodents to nurse it back to health. Meanwhile, a chiropractor fixes Peter's injury by realigning his spine - and restoring him to his "true height" of 6'5".
Stewie "breaks up with" Rupert after learning that he used to belong to Chris. Unable to get over his feelings of betrayal, Stewie decides to take action.
Stewie finally says his first word, and it's a swear. When Lois is shunned by the other moms, she tries to figure out where Stewie could have possibly learned it.
