Mr. Burns buys out Springfield's media outlets after a newspaper mistakenly reports his death, and Lisa's homemade newspaper is next on his list.
After receiving an injection from Dr. Hibbert, Bart becomes temporarily deaf, which makes him impervious to being bullied, until he accidentally moons the American flag during a donkey basketball game, prompting everyone in town to accuse the Simpsons of being unpatriotic under the new "Government Knows Best" Act.
Homer and Marge recall the story of their first kiss at a summer camp when they were children—an event which was not all happy, as Homer (unwillingly) betrayed Marge by standing her up on their second date.
Homer becomes "Pie Man", a masked vigilante who delivers a pie in the face of justice to evildoers. However, after attacking Mr. Burns, Burns hires him as a personal hitman, until Homer is ordered to attack the Dalai Lama.
After a ruined movie night, thanks to Bart and Lisa, Homer and Marge take a vacation away from them, but decide to go to Miami instead of going to see an uncle. When Bart and Lisa catch wind of their parents' secret plan, Bart steals Rod's credit card (just like Homer stole Ned's) and go after them.
After hearing that Skinner is getting cold feet about their wedding, Edna leaves Skinner at the altar and, after sending back one marriage gift, hooks up with Comic Book Guy. Meanwhile, Homer and Marge have an argument about if their marriage is still solid or not.
Bart gets sent to juvenile hall after fooling everyone that there was a marriage concerning him. He encounters a dangerous girl there... He flees with Gina, but then the two are caught by Wiggum.
Homer and Marge's bond becomes stronger when they both get drunk on wine, but soon the bond unravels when Homer blames Marge for crashing the car and Marge gets sent to rehab. Meanwhile, Bart and Lisa complain to Randall Curtis (a George Lucas-esque science fiction movie director) about his latest film.
The Simpsons go on a late-night attic search after Bart and Lisa (who are freaked out over a horror movie Homer let them watch) begin hearing voices -- and find Marge's ex-prom date Artie Ziff, who's on the run for cheating the shareholders of his company.
When Maggie does better than Lisa on an IQ test, Lisa becomes upset over no longer being the smart one and tries to lead Maggie astray.
Bart finds a friend in his own sister Lisa after Milhouse moves away to Capitol City to live with his divorced mom. Meanwhile Homer goes into panhandling to buy anniversary gifts for Marge. Later on Milhouse returns and Bart goes back being friends with him.
When the local library proves to be useless for the kids' class project, Marge tells Milhouse, Bart, and Lisa three Simpsons-style historical accounts: Henry VIII's (Homer's) attempts at siring a son, Lewis and Clark (Lenny and Carl) exploring the USA's wilderness with Sacagawea (Lisa), and Salieri (Lisa again) out to ruin piano-playing virtuoso Mozart (Bart).
Marge writes a romance novel with characters based on Homer and Ned Flanders that becomes a hit. Meanwhile, Homer gets fired from the power plant again and becomes an ambulance driver.
Homer builds a battle robot to win Bart's respect, and places it in a tournament against other robots. What Bart does not know, though, is that the robot is actually Homer in costume. Meanwhile, Snowball II dies and Lisa tries to find a replacement cat.
When a group of singles, seniors, childless couples, teens and gays band together to protest having to accommodate families (including paying property taxes used to teach children they do not have) after a riot at a children's concert, Marge takes up the cause for the families, with some help from Bart and Lisa.
Homer realizes how selfish he is after he spends all the family's Christmas money on a present for himself. He becomes the nicest guy in town, making Ned Flanders jealous.
Krusty discovers that he never had a bar mitzvah as a child. He quits his show to have it as an adult, with the help of his father, Rabbi Krustofski. Meanwhile, Homer hosts a late-night talk show a la "Politically Incorrect with Bill Maher" as a replacement for Krusty's show.
Homer is humiliated when he appears on the news running from a bear that nearly attacks him at the city dump. After Grampa scolds him, he swears to fight the bear himself.
After making over $3000 from his own museum featuring a $1000 bill, Bart takes the family to London (on the suggestion of Grampa), where Homer is arrested for treason after crashing into the Queen.
In this loose parody of the musical/movie Evita, Lisa is elected Student Body president, but is unaware that the school staff is using her for their own devices and as a scapegoat if something goes wrong.
Homer's mother returns, and after being cleared of all charges, is re-imprisoned on a technicality.
"Reaper Madness" - Death becomes Homer and our hero must learn to reap what he sows (and pull a fast one on the almighty). "Frinkenstein" - Soon to be Nobel-prize winning Professor Frink reanimates his father for some gruesome body parts-swapping. "Stop the World, I Want to Goof Off" - A parody of Clockstoppers, starring Bart and Milhouse.
